Sunday, January 22, 2012

“Improv”-ing/imitation 1, Week 1

This is an improvisation based on Craig Raine's "A Martian Sends a Postcard Home".

Selected stanzas:

Only the young are allowed to suffer
openly. Adults go to a punishment room

with water but nothing to eat.
They lock the door and suffer the noises

alone. No one is exempt
and everyone's pain has a different smell.

Improvisation:

The teens make wafers
with their flesh,
in hiding from the adults.

The adults make wafers,
with their bodies,
in hiding from the children.

The children build entire cities
with their hands,
whilst eating wafers.
The adults do not possess these gifts,
such architectural powers!

Note: some adults possess the ability to
pour out miniature children when others shout "push!"
in unison.
But only after the adult has made wafers.

1 comment:

  1. Look again at these lines:

    The children build entire cities
    with their hands.

    Osa, this is the kind of writing that can ignite the imagination. Start a draft with that, and let it dictate where the writing leads.

    ReplyDelete